Itās been over a year since Iāve posted a blog (actually itās been 506 days to be exact, but whoās counting?). The last time you heard from me I was starting an amazing new job and then BOOM, I ghosted you. Itās taken me nearly a year and a half to admit to myself and now to you, that Iāve been hiding.
But I havenāt just been hiding from you. Iāve been hiding in my life, career, and relationships too. When I read this quote from Brene Brown a few weeks ago it rocked me to my core:
āAll of this pretending and performing ā these coping mechanisms that youāve developed to protect yourself from feeling inadequate and getting hurt ā has to go. Your armor is preventing you from growing into your gifts. I understand that you needed these protections when you were small. I understand that you believed your armor could help you secure all of the things you needed to feel worthy and lovable, but youāre still searching and youāre more lost than ever. Time is growing short. There are unexplored adventures ahead of you. You canāt live the rest of your life worried about what other people think. You were born worthy of love and belonging. Courage and daring are coursing through your veins… Itās time to show up and be seen.ā
What stood out most was: Ā
āYour armor is preventing you from growing into your gifts.ā
For years my armor has been perfectionism, over achievement and trying to control every aspect of my life and it was burning me OUT.
Itās no coincidence that the title of the Brene Brown post was called āThe Midlife Unravelingā because thatās exactly what Iād been experiencing in my own life. It’s been one of the most uncomfortable yet cathartic processes of my entire life. Ā It began about 6 months ago when I ended relationships, unfriended folks and disconnected from social media, stopped drinking, stopped dating and got off of every dating app. I sat in solitude. A LOT.
I gave myself permission to actually feel my feelings of overwhelm, guilt, and shame. I let go of everything that no longer served me so I could actually get clear about who I really am, what lights me up, and most importantly, how I want to share my gifts with the world. And who Iād stop pretending to be.
Now that the election is finally over, there are so many projects that I’m excited about putting into the world. What Iāve learned from my āunravelingā is that itās time to show up differently and Iām now challenging myself to do that in every area of my life. While there is sooooo much more for me to get clarity about, one thing I know for sure is that I want to help other women, especially women of color, show up in their lives and careers differently too.
After taking the past few weeks off to rest, crochet (my absolute favorite new hobby by the way!), and eat real food, Iām excited to lean into what Iāve been doing unofficially for years – providing clarity and career coaching for bold women – in an official capacity.
Iād looooove to work with you if youāre:
– Also a recovering perfectionist, overachiever and/or control freak
– Ready to let go of controlling every aspect of the world around you and instead are willing to surrender to the plan that the universe has for you (which is waaaay better than what you could ever dream up for yourself)
– Ready to be seen, like ACTUALLY seen, imperfections and all in your life, career, relationships and even friendships
– Done checking off boxes and following all the ārulesā (i.e. go to school and get a good job but yet youāre MISERABLE) and are ready toĀ Ā step into a new plan for your life + career
On our journey together youāll discover:
– What TRULY lights you up, brings you joy and how to do the work you love every single day (and ACTUALLY get paid for it)
– How to break destructive patterns and limiting beliefs that are keeping you safe, stuck and broke
– How to show up in your life and career as not just your best self, but as your authentic self, so you can attract everything that is waitingĀ Ā for you
If you (or someone you know) would be interested in working with me can you leave a comment and let me know: whatās your armor? Ā What could be keeping you from growing into your gifts in 2019?
With love,
Rebecca
P.S. One of the other reasons that Iāve been hiding from you is that I thought I needed to have it all figured out myself before I could help you (shaking my fist at perfectionism syndromeā¦) but I know thatās not true. With 2019 just around the corner, letās go on this journey together of showing up as our authentic and imperfect selves because the world needs our light now more than ever before.
A truly inspiring and encouraging read. Your words regarding pivoting in your career to pursue more of your life path by turning toward your natural passion to coach others in plan sight instead of hiding on the path you are currently on and squirreling away your gifts and talents in unofficial part-time pursuit, has helped to awaken and untether me. Thank you for sharing!
You should facilitate a class/workshop. I would definitely love your feedback and also share experiences with other women.
Thanks Becky !! Ur a Great inspiration towards breaking through internal fears people try not to address!!!
Yes, Yes Ur Gift will make room for u, Walk in it!!
Thanks Ros! Hoping my vulnerability will encourage others to do the same.